'Space Detectives' - radio soap 2002
Chip World, 3.2.1.
Scene 1
Zelda's Office. Morning.1 FX: Silica walking down corridor towards Boss's office door. She knocks on it, enters a code and storms in. Interior, Zelda's office. The door
slams behind Silica.2 Silica: (annoyed) Zelda, Dave's just told me....
3 Zelda: (sarcastic) Silica, do come in
4 Silica: Sorry (annoyed), It's just he's....
5 Zelda: Never come into my office without permission.
6 Silica: Sorry! (Sarcastically), Chip world, we've got a job there, right? I've just heard from Dave (disgusted) No one told me!
7 Zelda: (keeping her cool) I was just about to.
8 Silica:This is so unfair! He's just the new boy!
9 Zelda: I want you to lead the mission. I was waiting to see you on your own, but seeing as you're here....
10 Silica: What? (delighted, change of tone)
11 Zelda: Always trust me in the way I handle cases Silica. (Pause, to show this was why she was waiting to see Silica alone) I want you to be team
leader. You know Chip World so well.
12 Silica: Wow!.... (to self) I've always felt I just needed an opportunity to prove myself....
13 Zelda: Take the job seriously....and resist any temptation to go on a DNA shopping spree (laughs)!
14 Silica: (defensively, bitter) Advice taken.
15 Zelda: Mrs Nervous, Chip World's deputy, suspects that the company manager- Mr Mean- is trying to steal the K62 microchip.
16 Silica: (emphasise, amazed) That chip lists every DNA formula they've ever used.
17 Zelda: That's right. (serious) You are team leader. A lot of the investigating should be done alone. The less the group are together the
better.
18 Silica: So Mr Mean doesn't know we've been hired. So when do I start?
19 Computer (over a siren): Ship to begin LAND MODE in 05 seconds.
Destination, 0.35 Degrees South South West, Planet Chip World.
3....2....120 FX Ship Beginning to land
21 Silica: Now?! No one told me!
22 Zelda: Silica....
23 Silica: (serious)I won't let you down.... (embarrassed) If I succeed, they might show me how to make my own DIY DNA...., (softer) only kidding.24 FX: Fade computer out to external of ship landing.
(END OF SCENE)
3. 2. 2
Planet Chip WorldAngel, Dave, Silica are just landed.
1 Pleasant sounding tanoy: Welcome to Chip World. Resort maps are on the stands in front of you. To your left is the MovieDrome, right is the
Golden Hollywood Hall and the West Wing contains all Top 40 pop artists from 1950 onwards. All Departments contain the creme of celebrities from
these era's at reasonable prices. Account holders will delighted to know they have a 20% discount for all afternoon! Have a Nice day!2 FX Soundscape to give impression of Chip World, and the famous people in it as Angel and Dave walk through it. They gasp and wonder at the
exhibits and press demonstration buttons etc. Small Dialogue such as " Look over here", "X's over there" would need to be included to show what
was happening.3 Angel: Wow!
4 Dave: It's like Disney World for Grown ups! Celebrities just walking around every where!
5 Silica: They're just copies, you idiot!
6 Angel: There's Bruce Willis, and Meg Ryan (Walking off the ship) Oh my Gosh! The Beatle's are performing over there!
7 Silica: Please people, you sound like such tourists! Zelda wants me to have a personal meeting with Maggie Nifficent, so if you'll excuse me.
(Exit Silica)
8 Dave: She's lovin' being in charge, isn't she? I'm surprise her head could get out of the ship.9 FX Robot approaching.
10 Dave: Oh, look! Claudia Schieuffer's coming straight towards us! This is my chance to find love, a bit of the Dave Mumford charm is enough
to woo any young lady.
11 Tour Guide: Hello Ladies and Gentlemen, Welcome to Chip World. Where your Vanity Dreams come true.
12 Dave: (giggles, clears his through in an attempt to sound manly) Oh, Claudia.
13 Tour Guide: My name is not Claudia, It's TG XZ3X, I am your Tour Guide for today.
14 Dave: Wow. With a name that impressive, maybe I should hear your phone number.
15 Angel: Oh, please.
16 Tour Guide: I have the appearance of Claudia Schieuffer, the wit of John Cleeze and the Brain of Carol Vorderman, although I paid an extra £100
lunar Dollar to ensure her Dress sense was wiped.
17 Dave: Clever move.
18 Tour Guide: The seductive aura of Jerry Hall was my first spend here, and I have been addicted every since.
19 Dave: I Love your aura, I'd look great on my bedroom floor.
(Angel tuts and sighs)
20 Tour Guide: I will know show you a detailed tour of each department, Please follow.21 FX Robot begins to move to distance, Angel and Dave follow.
22 Angel: Oh, no. We're not here for....
23 Dave: Sh! Go along with it. It may help our research.
24 Angel: Yeah right.(END OF SCENE)
3.2.3.
Mrs Nervous's Office.Midmorning.
Silica and Mrs Nervous.1 FX: Door closing, Silica walking into the room and sitting at the desk.
2 Mrs Nervous: Thanks for coming Silica.
3 Silica: (shocked) Oh....I thought all the staff here would lap up the opportunities to up grade themselves with the DNA samples. Perks of the
job and all that.
4 Mrs Nervous: I suppose, the novelty of making yourself beautiful wears off after a while. I used to look like Liz Hurley, with Jennifer Lopez's
backside.
5 Silica: Nice
6 Mrs Nervous: Being adored wherever I went got so tiresome, like taking work with you wherever you went. I opted for a simple life and transformed
myself to Anne Robinson, period.
7 Silica: (unimpressed, can't relate to it) So business isn't going too well?
8 Mrs Nervous: Mr Mean is trying to sabotage it.
9 Silica: (worried for herself) If he steals the chip the shop would close.
10 Mrs Nervous: I'm glad you under stand the significance of it. I'll be staying out of your way- if Mr Mean suspects I'm up to something he won't
take to it kindly. The only help I can give you is this Remote Control.11 FX Buttons pressing and bleeping noises as she demonstrates it
12 Mrs Nervous: It powers everything in the central lab from up to 100 metres away. The cameras, lights, locks, timers, everything.
13 Silica: Won't Mr Mean know I have it?
14 Mrs Nervous: He thinks it's being repaired until the end of the week, so you have to be finished with it by then. I can trust you with it, can't I?
15 Silica: (distracted, studying the remote control) That gives us four days....
16 Mrs Nervous: You can do it, I know you can. Please, I'm desperate.
17 Silica: Don't Worry " he who dares, wins", that's what our colleague the great hero Dave Mumford once said and we won't let you down.(END OF SCENE)
3.2.4.
Silica, Zelda, Dave, Angel.Ship Control room.
Silica is telling the group what she knows about the Chip World job.1 Zelda: Well, Silica, you really seem to be making progress with the Chip World Case. Isn't she good, Dave?
2 Dave: Humph.
3 Silica: Thank you. I think the best plan is to set up a Surveillance operation on the Central lab, to see what Victor Steel is up to.
4 Zelda: Good idea!
5 Silica: Maggie showed me the K62, it's state- of the -art. I could see why Victor wants it so badly. We still have our surveillance van in the
Warehouse; I've sent Spinner and Angel to find it. I would have sent Dave, but he wasn't much good helping Spinner look for things yesterday.
6 Dave: Very Funny.
7 Silica: So, we need to get the van out straight away.
8 Angel: (Approaching) That's no problem! We've found it, Spinner's just loading it into the exit bay.
9 Silica: Excellent! We need to take all recording and filming equipment.
10 Dave: O.k.
11 Silica: And take my x3 super- Zoom camera arm out of store.
12 Angel: No problem.
13 Zelda: Good idea, you've really thought about this.
14 Silica: And make sure the coffee machine still works in the van. We could be in there for hours.
15 Dave: O.K.
16 Silica: And, install a mirror in there, all this crime fighting can be hazardous to my hairdo.
17 Angel: No problem.
18 Zelda: I'm really proud of how you're handling this, Silica.
19 Dave: One question..?
20 Silica: What?
21 Dave: These fake celebrities, can they take? I mean quote the films they were from?
22 Silica: (irritated) No, what's that got to do with anything?
23 Dave: (sheepish, worried) Oh, nothing.(END OF SCENE)
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