'Crime Crackers' Episode 9
2-4-1 Nanette Aldous
INT: FRONT ROOM/OFFICE
Naz: consider me temporary boss Lavinia; you're not quite with us today
Lavinia: have this nagging feeling-never get so drunk I can't remember
Naz: facts so far, £40m worth of painting- stolen- right next door, last night
Lavinia: Naz I'm in the frame, right next door, we're going to be questioned
Naz: now hacking into Canterbury high-street CCTV, they stream it online
Lavinia: need to solve this one before-
Naz: cameras on front and back doors of gallery
FX COMPUTER CLICK. FRONT DOOR OPENING
Sting: guys, there's been a robbery next door dur-
Lavinia: we know
Sting: bumped into Ski, mate from home- working as a Copper,
Lavinia: go on
Sting: told me the alarm and cameras were cut at 12.17, secondary control panel used somewhere in this building
Naz: CCTV shows thief didn't use front or back door, no one near gallery all night, except for
Lavinia: except for what Naz
Naz: except for you and Mr Orlando Vandercamp coming back here at 11.46
Lavinia: that's decided it, we have to find a way in to that gallery, get to the evidence first
FX HEAR POLICE SIREN OUTSIDE
Sting: they've got the whole building sealed off; they're waiting for forensics
Lavinia: Naz, Orlando was architect for the gallery refurb
Naz: already searched his name, found his home network, he lives on Dover Road
Sting: come on geek boy we hardly gonna pop round for tea
Naz: there, in on his files, I'm bringing up the plans for the gallery look got it
Lavinia: go on then
Naz: there's a secret passage, runs parallel with our back wall, they take art in and out
Sting: be easy to get through there, let's do it
Naz: I'm gonna get Jade we'll need a forensic expert
2-4-2
INT: BACK ROOM/KITCHEN
FX BANGING INTO WARDROBESting: see Lav, even thought it's fixed to wall these wardrobe doors can be opened
Lavinia: what's inside?
FX WARDROBE DOOR OPENING
Sting: you're not gonna believe this
Lavinia: let me se-
Sting: the back is hanging off, look it leads straight into the gallery passage
Lavinia: let's get Jade, it's too risky for me to go in, I'll be prime suspect
Sting: you and Helen Mirren both
Lavinia: get Naz, Jade, now, no time
2-4-3
INT: INSIDE GALLERY
JADE AND NAZ CRAWLING ACROSS FLOORJade: I can't go out any further, I'll be seen
FX HEAR POLICE SIREN OUTSIDE
Naz: pass me the swabs I'll bag them
FX WHIRRING NOISE
Naz: what's that
Jade: electrostatic dust print lifter
Naz: (sarcastic) of course, a women's job is never done
Jade: need to do a static lift for small trace evidence
Naz: En Anglais?
Jade: clothing fibres
Naz: you sure we're ok to take all this to the University labs
Jade: we haven't got much choice
Naz: how will we get in?
Jade: my lecturer would do anything for me
Naz: why, you do anything for him?
Jade: shut it Nazi
Naz: whatever
Jade: uber geek
Naz: dust bug
Jade: you're only here cos you mum used a bus stop for protection
FX ALARM SOUNDING
Naz: let's bag the evidence and scram
2-4-4
INT: KITCHENETTE
FX ALCHOLIC DRINK BEING POURED
Lavinia: (monologue) hair of the dog
FX LAVINIA TAKES LARGE DRINK
Lavinia: urgh if it wasn't me and no one else was around, Orlando must have had something to do with it, damn it Orlando must have been the thief. So quick to disappear, I don't know anything about him except his name. Why would someone rob a gallery they were so involved with, why don't I remember anything, he must have got me so drunk he knew I would pass out and he could go through the wall and steal the painting then - how did he know the wall was - he must have been planning this for - oh it all sounds so stupid. The wall is going to be discovered as some as police forensics get in there; I'm going to be held responsible, Orlando's my only alibi, what a mess
FX NOISE OF NAZ AND JADE COMING BACK THROUGH WALL/ WARDROBE
Jade: Inspector Clouseau here set off an alarm so we had to bail
Naz: we got some-
Jade: I got
Naz: Jade collected bags of evidence we're going to hit the lab
Lavinia: imperative we get out of here, Sting's gone awol again, he went out saying something about cornering Orlando
Naz: evidence is all pointing to him right now, jade see if you can find some of this big shot's clothing fibres here - we might be able to make a match
Jade: you saying the guy that stayed here last night with Lavinia is responsible
Lavinia: (overcome) well it wasn't me
Naz: I still can't understand why you didn't wake up
Lavinia: It's like I was drugged
Jade: hang on, Orlando Vandercamp, the man you
Lavinia: yes you met him on the high-street, I remember that much
Jade: Orlando Vandercamp, the architect yeah? The man you were with was not Vandercamp
Lavinia: you sure
Jade: one hundred per cent
Lavinia: but the restaurant, his credit card, the waitress called him Mr Vandercamp
Jade: I'm telling you
Naz: if it wasn't the real guy who w